All posts by David Jennings

This is my short bio.

Donkey Punched

Last Friday, my friend Alex visited this site, clicked on an ad, and was traumatized. No, the link didn’t whisk him off to RetardsRomancingRottweilers.com or anything of the sort. While that might have been distasteful, or even stomach-turning, he could at least get through the experience without fear for the contents of his wallet.

Not so with Why Mommy Is a Democrat, a website promoting a children’s book of the same name. I went to visit the site and it didn’t take long to see what all the fuss was about.

The section featuring sample pages shows Mommy Squirrel and her blue-state brood leading a considerate existence while the text on the page tells us “Democrats make sure we all share our toys, just like Mommy does.” For contrast, two selfish people, presumably Republicans, seem not to give a shit as they walk by some guy, presumably homeless, hunkering on a park bench and lamenting his sorry lot.

I can see how this might cause my friend concern. He owns his own business and due to a combination of brains, talent, and the willingness to work to the point where it nearly kills him, he has managed to amass a fair chunk of change. The sight of indoctrinating a future generation to want to take it all away from him when he’s too old to defend himself can’t be pleasant.

My objections are a little different. I actually favor social programs as long as the safety net doesn’t turn into a hammock, though the real reason I side with the Dems is that they pose a lesser threat to our inalienable right to fuck and get high.

The problem I have is that the author has unwittingly written propaganda for the GOP. Drug-addict endomorph Rush Limbaugh has already pitched a hissy over the book. There will be more to follow and I know exactly what line they are going to spew: “Big-government Democrats’ agenda has always been to take control of people’s private lives. Vote Republican. We respect the individual.”

Yeah, unless the individual doesn’t get a stiffy for Jesus, wants to marry someone of the same sex, or has a problem supporting an unwinnable war sold to the public with a heaping helping of lies.